While cleaning out some of my grandmother's house, we found a box of her memories. Lots and lots of pictures, tons of newspaper clippings, report cards and classwork of her 5 children and even a few pictures my girls had drawn were a small portion of what we found, but somewhere in that box of memories we ran across what I feel may be the most valuable find....my papa's love letters to my grandmother. Kept neatly in a rose colored stationary holder, tied with pink satin ribbon. I can just imagine my grandmother holding the box closely to her chest after adding the newest letter to the box. Many letters had lipstick kiss marks on the letters where she had kissed his words in the letters.....
Just spending the little bit of time looking through part of the letters, I felt like I was stepping back in time and spying on a love story I had never heard. Yes, my grandparents were married for over 50 years....closer to 60 I believe before my papa died. They lived a long life together but I'm not sure I ever saw this love that they shared. Yes, I know they loved each other, but the love I saw was tempered by 5 children, 8 grandchildren, 5 great-grandchildren and finally one great-great grandchild. They were hard years with many heartaches along the way. They loved and lost, cried and bled, worked hard and lived modestly. But before all of this....they loved each other....with a young love. A fierce love. A passionate love. A tender love.
How blessed I feel to have these letters!!! I am slowly putting them in chronological order to the best of my knowledge. Most have been dated by my papa, who seemed to write almost every day! I plan to read them after they are in order. The few I have read have already made me cry. To hear the love in my papa's words and the loneliness he felt being away from my granny is so heart warming. To hear him call her "baby" and "darling" and "precious wife" during his time of serving in the war, and then working so far from home and longing to have her with him. I feel drawn back to the 1940s and a time in history where you had little but loved much.
This is an adventure that I am both excited and fearful to start on. Granny died a month ago today. I still haven't cried as much as I know I need to. I miss her....and have many many regrets over the past years of the moments I missed with her. Delving into her history and seeing a part of her life that she didn't openly share with me...or anyone else...makes me nervous. I would never want her to be mad at me. I have walked that thin line of knowing whether she was proud of me or not for most of my life. I just pray I can honor her and Papa through this. Is it time for me to write a book....maybe. But this one will be the story of my grandparents who shared a very real love that held them together for more than 60 years and left our family a legacy that we are just now beginning to understand.
Hang on tight....you may be my sounding board as I venture down the emotional highway.
2 comments:
I'm so excited for you! This is truly a gift... to get to know so intimately the legacy of love that your family was built on. I too feel a book in the making. I'm left with the same anticipation and desires of the heart as when I read "Redeeming Love". Even though you'll likely find one or two difficult pieces of knowledge, I'm certain that discovering the foundation of a rare, life-long marriage was pure love and devotion will out-weigh all else. As far as grandmother's approval, how could she be anything but proud?! You are an eloquent, gorgeous, tender-hearted, creative, passionate... and you share all of these traits with your family and closest friends. You are a rare find my friend, just like these letters. Love you.
In His name
The words of your grandfather are precious to me--and foreign. I wish I had copies of Mother's response to each of those letters, but knowing GrandMary as I do, I suspect she threw her letters away and kept only Daddy's.
When these letters were first found, I read a couple aloud to your uncles, Bobby and Tommy. The immediate response in all three of us was, "What happened? What went wrong in their marriage?" We don't know the answer to these questions. I told Mother that I had found these letters and she acted angry with me--I think she was only faking it. She told me nothing about them.
I can come up with some photos of your grandparents when they were very young that you can use to illustrate your book. They were both quite beautiful in those years. I hope as you read one of your PawPaw's letters that you will be able to imagine the sweet loving response of a beautiful young woman with equal longing for his arms and kisses. That should be a true representation of the love they shared before life became so difficult for them.
Know they loved each other, their children and families, and they loved you-their first grandchild! You were their pride and joy! d
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