On Her Own....

Well, we did it! We took our baby girl off two hours away and dumped her in the middle of nowhere! Seriously, it is the middle of NOWHERE! Or, you could call it the sticks, boondocks, outback, or whatever you want to call the middle of the woods in East Texas. Two hours from Kaufman and many twists and turns later, we arrived at my baby girl's new home for the next two weeks. Camp Deer Run!

Okay, so I am a little over dramatic....maybe that is where Chelsea gets it.... However, it did seem like we drove forever away and left her in middle of the woods. She is my baby girl. My little baby, who will turn 10 in a week without me. She will sleep in a cabin full of strangers....with the exception of one friend that is with her....and will be cared for by a very young woman. This first camp experience for her should be a great one and I am praying she will love every minute of it.

The camp was very nice in comparison to some I have seen. Her cabin is even right next to the bath house. She won't have to trek through the woods to find the potty in the middle of the night. She is sleeping on a top bunk and Mike rigged up her fan so it blows right on top of her. Her dirty clothes bag is hanging on her bed corner and everything else is perfectly packed and stored where it should be. Her friend is on the top bunk right beside her. She got her bed made and was seeming to get to know some of the girls....well at least the one directly under her bunk.

It was already hot and I noticed a bug bite on her neck already. We sprayed her down with bug spray and gave those last few instructions about staying safe and being sure to wear the spray every day. We even remembered to pack a bottle of clear fingernail polish to put on those bites. Hopefully we covered all the bases before we kissed her good-bye.

(Chelsea is in this group pic. She is standing in front of the girl with the bright green shirt. She has on a grey shirt, blue jean capris and pink shoes. Looks like she is having fun!)

It didn't hit me until on the ride home that she was going to have to navigate this world on her own for the first time in her life. She has always had the protection and guidance of one of us. She is blessed with 3 moms in many ways. She doesn't like it all the time that she has the two sister-moms to keep an ever watchful eye on her, but she loves having them take care of her needs. She is never far from someone who knows one of us or can care for her if we are not quickly available. But this time, she is pretty much on her own. She does have someone to look after her, but it is just not the same. They don't know her. They don't know what scares her or makes her sad. She will have to navigate these two weeks without anyone who really knows her.

I've known people who have moved in to our church family or my work family, who have been pretty much on their own. No one who really knows them or is there as their support. I grew up and still have a large portion of family around me. Family has always been more than available around us. Family, whether by birth or by many years living and working and growing up together, have always been a part of reality for me and has often made life easier. I don't really understand how people make it without that support system. How lonely life would really be! On the other hand, sometimes I wonder if I have missed out on some growing experiences by never having been very far from that support system. I know that I have a hard time standing alone and being "brave" in this world. Some of that is because I didn't go and be on my own very much. I'm not sure I would have been able to make it very long in this big world without my system of support.

But this is not about me....this is about my baby girl learning to be brave in this world. She, like her sisters, will figure out how to get along with girls that are different. As I watched other moms set up their daughter's bed or hang the fans, I realized we are not the only ones going through the feelings of anxiousness at leaving our baby girl. Some of the girls seem much more unsure of themselves than Chels. One little girl seemed to just be counting the minutes until her mom would leave. I thought I was overbearing at times! I had nothing on this mom. Poor little girl....this must be her escape! Then there was Chelsea's friend, who's mom didn't even walk to the cabin to help her. She did it all on her own. When we left, she was looking for her parents for her good-bye hug.

I know, really I do know, that Chels will be okay. She will learn a lot about herself. She will learn to spread those independent wings and fly on her own, without the watchful eye of her family. Here she will begin to really develop who she is in her own skin, who she is when we aren't watching. She will grow, she will fall, she will hurt, she will cry and, she will laugh and smile some too. Life and growing up is full of adventures and these two weeks will be the beginning of some of those for my baby girl. I ask that you keep her in your prayers. Pray that she had a blast and learns more about herself. But most of all, pray that her relationship with God grows deeper and that her young heart finds that He is always with her, even when I can't be.